Remember how I said I conduct like I’m having a grand mal seizure?

SO DOES HANNU LINTU! Small world.

I would love to tell you all about the BSO’s performance in the U. S. premiere of Rautavaara’s Incantations last Thursday. Unfortunately, I was so distracted by Lintu’s antics I barely noticed. The man conducts like one of those puppets jointed with strings that when you press the base they collapse. At several points he was conducting with naught but fingers bent into an eagle’s claw. The man is a nutter butter.

I liked his Finlandia, though. And he did the first and third movements of my beloved Beethoven’s Symphony No. 7 well. The holy second movement was a smidge speedy and disjointed, but had settled into greater smoothness by the end. I kept my eyes closed the whole time. Perfect music for rain.

The fourth movement, though. Lord, the fourth movement. I wish I could hum it to you twice – once at the speed I am accustomed to and enjoy (conducted by Berstein, so you know it’s good), and once Lintu-style. Let’s see if onomatopoeia can do this thing justice:

Bernstein: DUH duh duh duh duh duh duh DUH duh duh duh duh duh duh DUH duh duh duh duh duh duh DUH DAH DAH!

Lintu: DUHdhdhdhdhdhdhDUHdhdhdhdhdhdhdhDUHdhdhdhdhdhdhdhDAHDAH
REPEATIMMEDIATELYRESTSAREALEADINGCAUSEOFDEATH!!!!

In other words: SLOW DOWN, dude. Take a breath now and again. I know it’s allegro con brio but that’s not the same as presto et mort. Chill. To reiterate what is becoming a motif of this blog, fast is not necessarily equal to good!

In other news, Colin Currie actually appears to be the same age as his promotional pictures, which is a novelty indeed.